Sharing

Sharing

First, thanks for liking and reading my first post. If you recall, step one was sharing. Why did my son tell me to share? I have pondered this for a few days. I had a dream written, why not write more? Share? After pondering I am honored, he knows me. I need to plan, writing is part of the plan. Sharing is harder. Seriously, I love to write. It is pretty much my therapy. I write, file away and done. Rarely do I share, why not, feedback. LOL, as an Alverno Alum, feedback. 😀

Feedback

Feedback can be brutal, helpful, can I say brutal again? Even when helpful feedback is tough. As a doc student, educator, human I have received a lot of feedback (umm divorced, mom, educator). It grows one, skin must be tough. If you haven’t read Thanks for the Feedback (Stone & Heen, 2014) might be helpful. So, if you read my first blog you know I carried my dream folder around for sometime. I began writing my dream in response to an article I read about the 25 most beautiful libraries in America. It was also inspired in response to everyone asking what next as I come to the end of the doctoral journey. Well, this is MY dream, fun dream, balance, where I go when not working to dream. 

LOL you might say what a let down, you are completing your doctoral journey and then visitng libraries is your dream. Well, yes it beats the barista dream. Working on my dissertation I would sit in coffee shops, when not reading, working on dissertation and fantasize about serving coffee, so much easier than my life, more fun. Well my sister became a barista, not much money and a lot of work. I salute baristas, I need them. I learned for a lot it is a second job, baristas have to memorize so many drinks for little pay and no tips. Well some but really, do you tip your barista? When I learned what they made I became a barista tipper.  So this became my new dream.

What having this dream did do for me was lead me to a financial plan (well and the reality of the barista dream, I needed money to fund this dream). So I created a savings plan. Which yes I shared with my accountant son. His reply, DO IT! With, “Mom it is time you did something for you. Really! For my birthday please do one trip.” Hmmmm…

Honestly, I wrote the plan, carried it in my a folder in my purse but had tabled this dream as a barista dream. Yep, after my doctoral chair sent me my feedback and revisions began again, my dream stayed in my purse. I did not look at it until Dec. 25. I decided it was silly, one that I took out and read as an outlet from dissertation. I was thankful for the savings plan viewing it as the purpose and the good that had come out of this dream (part of the share with my son, figured would lesson the blow of  silly dream). Sharing with my son occurred after a couple drinks, his feedback sparked the dream again. I have had to ask him, so you do think this is a valid dream. 

Yes, now share, write, do. So creating blog, sharing my writing in this forum was first. Then New Years Eve I shared with a lifetime friend. Single mother, son raised, similar life as me. What occurred was magical. Thank you Maxies and Ben (best server ever) for a fabulous oysters, drinks, dinner and dessert. Your patience with us taking your table, you ROCK! 😀

What made it magical was she had a plan as well. We sat down and both started, “I have something to share!” I shared my library dream, which she got on board with. She shared her Dave Matthews, camping dream. I got on board. Then we got out our calendars and marked them up, shared our savings plans. Together we will continue to work our dreams after work, over oysters, drinks, dinner at Maxies. Thursday nights, happy hour $1.00 oysters, upsized beers dollar off any drink. Best deal ever! Right now on our calendars, spring break is a go, Dave Matthews a go (unsure of date), June library trip on the calendar as well as two camping trips and more. 

What have I learned. Sharing is good. I do believe you must choose who you share with, find supportive, brilliant souls to share with (like you).  Thanks for the feedback, so far no one has left negative comments (at this point, doesn’t matter if you do, sorry, I am doing this!). Dreaming is invigorating and leads to MORE, more connectedness, growth and breathes new life. So thanks for listening, supporting, Tag, your it, dream, share…. 

Best,

Fern

References:

Maxies, http://maxies.com/milwaukee/

Stone, D., & Heen, S. (2014). Thanks for the feedback: The science and art of 

receiving feedback well (even when it is off-base, unfair, poorly delivered, 

and frankly, you’re not in the mood). Viking Adult.